He hadn’t moved since he had grabbed the energon cube earlier. It still lay beside him, half empty as he desperately tried to keep it down - the last thing he wanted to do was clean up a mess.

His frame shook as he focused on his tanks, ignoring the feeling in his spark as he slowly moved to lower his helm to rest on his legs, his arms keeping him in a nice, small compact form.

Every single part of him hurt, and every single part of him screamed that he deserved this. He hated himself - he hated that he did deserve this. He hated that he’d left.

But what was in the past was in the past.

He barely registered anything around him as he fell deeper and deeper into his despair and self-hatred, wondering just how Starscream had gone, and cursing himself for leaving, for not being there.

second-incommand sent: I've been where you've been, in a manner of speaking. Sad to say that pain doesn't go away--it only dulls with the passage of time. You either let it consume you, or you grow accustomed.

he’s gone

my spark feels heavy

empty

i left him

i deserve this

all of this 

it hurts, hurts..

Anonymous sent: Do you need anything?

for my spark

to stop

hurting

Anonymous sent: are you drowning your despair in high grade?

no..

regular grade..

Skywarp stood, his legs barely supporting him as he stumbled over to grab a cube of energon for himself. As soon as he picked it up, he dropped back to the floor, his whole frame feeling weighed down by the weight of the emptiness in his spark.

He stared at the cube for a while, wondering if he could even handle it.

Coolant threatened to leak from his optics as he let out a small whine and downed a large gulp of the energon. It made him feel sick, it made him feel terrible, but he kept it down, focusing on that, rather than his spark.

It was better today.

But it still hurt.

The lingering pain from his spark that would likely never go away.

Anonymous sent: pull yourself together

no

Anonymous sent: You left him. Why do you care he's offline?

broken apart..

doesnt mean i

stopped loving 

Anonymous sent: good news is he's alive. bad news is he doesn't care that he ripped the bond apart

he’s not there

he’s gone

empty

hurts

Anonymous sent: he's still alive, idiot

As far as Skywarp was aware, Starscream was no longer registering through their bond. He felt his spark being ripped apart as Starscream’s part left it.

One does not simply recover from that within moments, and one does not have a rational mind after that.